2020 ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas

‘Twas the night before Christmas in the hardest of years where the world was distanced and had shed many tears. 

Everyone who could be home was already there, where cinnamon and peppermint scents filled the air. 

While most people dreamed in the dead of the night, others were working to keep spirits bright. 

An older woman stood alone on wobbly feet. It seemed she was tired and needed something to eat. 

I could barely see her face behind the mask and goggles she wore. They were so tightly on, her face must have been sore. 

But she kept on working despite any pain she was in. She had to help fight for those who needed to win. 

Her white shoes squeaked softly as she did her rounds. An angel of sorts in a PPE gown. 

She walked room to room in the quiet of night, caring for patients in dimmed hospital light. 

She took care of each person and did all

that she could, hoping her help would do them some good. 

Some patients were improving. Others were getting worse. This was the reality of the COVID curse. 

After a long night of work, when the sun started to rise, she said “goodbye” and “merry Christmas”, as the new staff walked by. 

She removed all of her gear and scrubbed as tears filled her eyes. When she finished scrubbing she gave in and started to cry. 

As she walked to her car with red eyes and another mask on her face, I wondered if she knew what a difference she made. 

She drove past some houses of holiday joy where children were playing with fancy new toys. 

Stopped at a stop sign she spotted a girl riding by, on a shiny new bike. A man rode behind her smiling with delight. 

She watched for a moment and felt a smile on her face and noticed the man looking her way. 

He caught her eye and waved at her. “Merry Christmas,” he said. She recognized him from a hospital bed. 

She’d held his hand when he needed it and prayed by his bedside. A few months ago he was the reason she’d cried.

She had thought he was done for but here he was, still alive, not even knowing she had helped him survive. 

She wished them Merry Christmas and drove slowly away. She was thankful for the miracle God had shown her that day. 

When she arrived home to her house, she showered, ate, and turned off the light. “Merry Christmas” she whispered,” and to all a good night. 

Fear, Guns, and God

In Orlando, Newtown, Chicago, (insert your current location here), and across the globe, violence, hate, anger, hostility, and criminal behavior run rampant. 

When a group or a lone person decides to hurt you or people you love, it's easy to lash out in disgust and outright anger. It's also easy to detach ourselves and believe that violence and all of these awful things are something that happens in other places. 

We must face reality: we live in a splintered and shattered society. We live in a world where it's possible to live, shop, or work beside a terrorist and have no clue. We also live in a world filled with hate and prejudice. We must not let these prejudices consume us. A terrorist can be anyone. Anyone. Of any background. 

Even if we put every control possible into place, terrorism is an evil that cannot be contained. There will always be another group surfacing or a lone wolf who is just waiting for an opportunity. So what can we do? Always abide by the "if you see something, say something" mentality, for one. Your action could be the one thing that changed everything. 

Try as we might, we ultimately cannot control what happens in the future. We need to accept that. We can all get alarms and guns and never let our children outside. We can choose to live in fear of our neighbors and stereotype people who could become our greatest friends. We can live inside our seemingly impenetrable bubble of fear. 

But what does that serve? You are going to have to step outside of your bubble one day. Or there will be something that happens that pops the bubble of fear beyond repair. 

The terrorist from the nightclub lived in my hometown. He went to high school with some of my friends. He lived less than ten houses from where my husband used to live. We went to the same community college. I did not know him. But he could have easily been sitting in a classroom, or shopping at a local grocery store beside me.

In this same city, a gun show went on last weekend at local civic center. The local news was there to report and the parking lot was insane. A church that usually occupies the civic center space was kicked outside. Imagine being in an outdoor church service in the blazing Florida sunshine and seeing people walking by constantly on their way in and out of a gun show, taking the place you usually use for worship to by weapons. Surreal. 

My city kicks out the faithful in favor of gun sales. I'm not against guns or self protection. It is simply ironic that in a city where the terrorist grew up and lived, there is a greater demand for guns than there is for faith. 

Defending your home and your family is your right and is not to be taken lightly. However, it is often said that there are no atheists on the battlefield. When weapons fail to protect us, and we are defenseless and all hope is lost, we must lean on God. 

Guns make us feel more protected. We can protect ourselves and our families. And in many cases, guns are beneficial. However, we are not in control. According to policeone.com, in America it is estimated that less than 12 percent of police officers will ever draw and fire their weapons at another person in the entire course of their career. Statistically, we are much, much more likely to die of disease than we are at the hands of a terrorist. 

When our loved ones and families get diseases and pass away, the only one we have left turn to is God.

The most powerful thing, above all else, is Love. We must love one another instead of living lives filled with hatred and fear. We must learn to respect, learn from, and appreciate our differences. 

We are fearfully and wonderfully made. Worry solves nothing. Get out there, love hard, live fully, and appreciate every day that you have been granted! Don't spend your life in a bubble! You will miss the chance to fully live the life you've worked so hard to protect

A Brand New Year! Hooray!

First off, Happy New Year! I chose this picture because I usually look like Charlie Brown looks in this photo when it comes to thinking about resolutions. I get it. The new year is like a blank-slate. The chance to do everything "right", or to do something "better". But, often, I think "right" and "better" are totally overrated and over-hyped. Especially when many people seem to be simply following the crowd when it comes to resolutions. 

I believe there are only two types of people in the world: Those that live their lives for themselves, and those that live their lives for other people. I want to live the life God intended for me, without worrying about boundaries that I've created based on others' opinions or ideas. Too often, we get wrapped up in trying to be perfect people. We are not perfect people, regardless of how often we hit the gym or eat a vegan diet, or get 10 college degrees. If you're creating your resolution based on what you think perfect should look like, my suggestion is to not bother. Make a resolution for you because it's something you strive for or desire. :-)

As far as my resolutions go, 2016 will be the year of reckless abandon and living dangerously. For me, living dangerously is not letting myself be pushed around, pushing myself to the limits, taking chances I never would have dreamed of, and attempting to write with that same passion, in addition to diving deeper into the Bible. 

This has been an eye-opening time of soul searching and discovery for me (I appreciate all the feedback I've received on yesterday's post in particular, by the way), and I'm having a blast considering and looking to what the future will hold for me. 

I am excited to greet 2016 with no regrets and nothing but optimism! And if you have resolutions this year, I wish you 2000% success with each of them!

Let your light shine bright in 2016! May you be safe, healthy, and happy!

Cheers! 

Kindness: The Insurmountable Power You Possess

I wonder how many people clicked this link thinking the title of this blog is an oxymoron. Kindness is easily confused as weakness. The truth it, it’s just the opposite. When someone is evil to you, it’s so easy to repay anger with anger or dissention with dissention. A true test of character, strength, and power is to show kindness to those who betray, hurt or ignore you.

The amazing thing is, no matter who we are, where we live, whether we’re rich or poor, we have the power to be kind to others, regardless of who they are. Smiles and grace are free and don’t need to be returned to make a difference in someone’s life. We never know what impact a small act can have on someone’s life, even if we never see that person again.

I’ve been really fortunate to have been treated with kindness by people in my life. I choose not to focus on those who have been unkind or who have violated me. I can definitely say that I am who I am because of the people who treated me with kindness. Sometimes kind words can mean everything. I sat on a novel I wrote for a long time because I didn’t think anyone would read it or would have anything nice to say about it. It was because of the kindness of others that I dared to put it out there. Every time I get an email or message from someone who has read it, or see a new positive review, I think of those people who showed me the kindness to encourage me to keep at it. Their encouragement cost nothing, but meant absolutely everything to me.

Kindness also has a tendency for perpetuating itself. My husband and I have been sponsoring a child in Haiti for several years now. He’s eight now, but I still remember his fifth birthday. We had the option to give him a bit extra for a birthday gift. I was thinking the organization would purchase a soccer ball or something he could play with. A few weeks later, a letter came. It explained that four of his family members had passed away, but that he had had a good birthday and that the funds I had sent had been spent on a hen. They were so appreciative of the gift, but it really put the value of our sponsorship into perspective for me. In that moment, I realized child sponsorship is one of the greatest things I’ve ever done. This year, we’ve begun sponsoring a little girl from Haiti as well. I can say with certainty that I’ve gotten more out of sponsoring these children than the monetary amount we give to them. I received a letter recently saying the family of one of our sponsored children is praying for us. A prayer costs them nothing, but has immeasurable power. I’m so humbled by the fact that these people who don’t even know us are willing to pray for us that I am beyond words.

It is easier to stay within your comfort zone. It’s safe living in our own little worlds. Why step out? Why do something for someone else without expecting something in return? Why make the world a better place by showing someone a little grace, or a little love. I think the better questions are: Why not step out? Why not do something for someone else without expecting something in return? Don’t we need a kinder, better world? Why not show more love and grace?

There is so much hurt and anger and violence in this world, but kindness is free. It can truly change the world and perpetuate goodness. Mark Twain said, “Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see,” and it’s absolutely true. By showing love and compassion for others, especially those who chastise or hurt us, it shows the power we truly hold. Loving your enemies does not make you weak. It gives you strength. It makes you a fighter and shows your enemies that you will not give in to their anger or hate. You will not sink to their level. You will rise above and be kind, not because you are weak, but because you can see past their anger or their past transgressions and be a bigger person.

This week, I challenge you to step out and step up. Be kind to someone who has wronged you. Maybe your grace and compassion will change their lives, but if not, it may very well change yours. Use your inner strength, that insurmountable power that you hold. You have the power and the strength to be kind. Don’t let it go to waste. Let your light shine brightly and share the gift of kindness with everyone around you!

Hunting Rainbows

Within the past few weeks, there have been several battles going on around me. I am learning that I can't control any of them, but that hasn't stopped me from wishing I could. At times, I want to shake certain people and ask them if they're serious. I want to tell them to think for themselves and to stop letting others dictate what happens. I want to make them feel better, make them happy, make others stop taking advantage of them. Then I remember that I can't make anyone do anything.

I have been struggling through a situation that I believe is wrong. Someone I love dearly has made a life choice that I believe was influenced by others who have ulterior motives. I have watched this person suffer and make choices that I know she would not have made, had it not been for the influencers. I pray this person is acting on her own accord, and that her best wishes are truly at heart for the influencers, but I also know the track record of said influences and believe that is not the case. It frustrates me to no end that there is nothing I can do change things. Fighting with the influences will not suffice or make any change. As hard as it is not to fight for someone I love, there is nothing I can do to change it. I have to let go.

I have a choice. I can stand by and watch it unfold before me, being as I have no control, or I can remove myself entirely from the situation. I have to remember God is in control, because I have none and never had any to begin with. However, what I allow into my life is what will continue. Therefore, those people can take a break from my life and my thoughts.

It seems like people perpetuate their own storms and then get mad when it rains. Once it rains (perpetuated or not), we all go hunting for rainbows. When the storms of life get the best of us, we go in search of something better, something to make us happy, something bright, maybe with a pot of gold at the end.

I wish life worked that way. I wish every time there was a storm, everyone would have their own rainbow to look forward to. Not to say it never happens, but we can't expect a rainbow every time. We're given our situations and our gifts and struggles for a reason. But we make choices every day about what we choose to do with all of our struggles as well as our gifts.

There's no sense in hunting for rainbows in places where you can't stop the rain from falling. I guess it's up to all of us to find our own rainbows and choose our own paths. I can only hope to encourage you to enjoy the gifts of friends and families every day because you never know when they will be ripped from your life by death or other circumstances beyond your control. Hold those moments and revel in them. Trust that God knows what he's doing, and focus on what you can control. :)





 

Impact

In celebration of Independence day, I offered No Man Sam for free on Amazon Kindle and posted on a few sites stating that I would be donating .10 to Surviving in Numbers, an amazing organization that helps victims of rape and domestic violence.

I had 37 downloads the first day of the promotion. I prayed we would have success and posted to one more website and the downloads went wild! I am happy to say my husband and I had the privilege and opportunity to donate more than we could have ever imagined and it was the best thing ever. Not because people downloaded the book, but because their hearts were into helping others, just as ours were.

An incredible thing happened then. No Man Sam became one of the top free downloads in teenage romance (I believe it peaked at #2) and it broke the top 100 (and nearly the top 50) in free Kindle books. I'm not a known author, (and likely never be and that's cool with me), but the fact that others were downloading the book and the fact that it was becoming more visible meant more $$'s for Surviving in Numbers!

If you have a chance to check out the organization, I highly recommend it. If, by chance, you did download No Man Sam during the promotional free period, THANK YOU! It means everything that you were willing to try out a book by an unknown author and also help a cool organization in the process. It's a win-win-win all around!

I believe amazing things can happen when we step outside ourselves for a while and take a walk in someone else's shoes. Sometimes it takes walking in someone else's shoes to appreciate what we have or to realize what our purpose is and how we become changed. It's kind of like writing a fiction novel. When I get the chance to walk in a main character's shoes, it's fun, but kind of surreal at the same time because I don't like when bad things happen to them (even though I'm pulling all the strings). I'm sure that sounds weird.

The scary thing is, often, reality is worse than fiction. I helped unpack and tag new backpacks this morning in my community. 4500 kids in my area are going to have backpacks full of the pens, pencils, and notebooks they need to get a great start. 4500 kids. The reality is, 4500 kids isn't all the needy ones in my area. I wonder how the inner city kids and teachers get by. It makes me angry that every child doesn't have what they need for school. We often take what we have for granted.

If you are reading this and are able, I challenge you. Find an organization you want to be part of and volunteer or send a donation.

Remember, there can never be too many volunteers and every donation can make a difference, Heck, a dime per download eventually turned into enough money for Surviving in Numbers to be able to get into a few more schools. Every little bit counts. Some other great organizations to consider include Compassion International, Blood Water Mission, and The Wounded Warrior Project. If everyone gave a little bit more and consumed a little bit less...just IMAGINE how amazing our world could be! :)

Ok, I'll come off the soapbox on the next post...I promise. I just had to write what was on my heart.

Life Lessons and Such.

Hi!
 
Please allow me to introduce myself. My name is Kristen Nannini, author of No Man Sam, and soon-to-be author of a Young Adult trilogy which is currently nameless. :) I love to write, to reach people, to go to the beach, and to play with my rescue puppy, and hang out with my husband. Although I'm new to blogging, I'm also new to going to the gym and I'm hoping both new things in my life work out as favorably as those I've been doing for some time. Thanks so much for checking out my blog! I've tried this blog thing once before and didn't succeed. Now, like the gym, I feel I'm up for a challenge!
 
I wanted to come up with a list of things I've learned, and re-learned over the past several years. I think it helps to look at where I'm at now, versus where I've been and the lessons that have been learned along the way. I believe the past has a tendency to repeat and these lessons have proved beneficial to me, so hopefully this list will be helpful to someone else. I'm sure many might disagree with some of the statements below. If you disagree, feel free to comment. I would love to hear your opinions. I just hope something on this list hits home for someone. Hopefully what I've learned in my time on this earth will help someone else :)
 
1. True forgiveness takes a gargantuan amount of courage.
2. Love is all around us, as is God.
3. Taking time to figure out what someone else is thinking is useless. Just ask or move on.
4. Sometimes we hurt others unintentionally. If every possible effort has been made to mend fences, we must move on. Hurt feelings are valid, but if there is no sense of forgiveness or acceptance of remorse, moving on is the only option we have.
5. It is much easier to forgive an enemy than it is to forgive a friend.
6. Communication is the key to living harmoniously. If we close the door, there is no way for new ideas to flow, bridges to be built, or relationships to be strengthened.
7. When life gives you lemons and you've no where to turn, figure out how to get yourself out and then tell/write about it. Someone else will be in that same place in the future.
8. Just saying hello and checking in with someone on your mind can mean all the difference in the world.  
9. Hindsight is always 20/20 but if we choose to live in the past, we will never be able to live for today.
10. Love is an amazing thing. It grows and changes and sometimes seems to take on a life of its own. When someone seems to deserve love the least, that's usually when they need it the most.
11. Change is never easy, but it's inevitable. Embrace it and grow from it and you will never feel forced into anything.
12. Money is a vicious and lovely thing. Spend it wisely and be wise and save some too. You can never be too wise when it comes to money, but it's easy to become too careless. Take care of your money so you can take care of yourself.
13. Growing plants takes time and love. Growing weeds takes inaction.
14. Sometimes it's better to listen to someone who you believe is wrong than take the energy to prove them wrong. Sometimes people just need to be heard with no judgment.
15. Music is an awesome thing. It can raise you up or bring you down so many levels. Choose your music wisely.
16. Enemies are only yours when you choose to create them. Regardless of who you believe is your enemy, treat them with kindness and love. You may one day make a friend, but at the very least, will have no hate in your heart to consume you.
17. Respect is something that should always be given blindly. A homeless man deserves as much respect as a business man. I guarantee the homeless man will appreciate it more. Never take someone else's respect for granted. It is so easily lost.
18. Always put yourself in someone else's shoes. In most cases, I'm very grateful and thankful to be stepping back into mine. Appreciate every gift you have regardless of how small or insignificant that may seem.
19. Freedom is something we should never, ever take for granted.
20. Sometimes when bad things turn out exactly as you expected, it sucks to be right. At the same time it's an excellent opportunity to reflect on what you've learned. Maybe it warrants expecting something different/better.
21. Drunk driving is a horrible thing which often affects people who don't drive drunk or drink very little themselves. If you have a friend or family member that needs help, getting them that help could save an untold amount of innocent lives.
22. People aren't perfect. They make mistakes and screw things up. You are no better or worse than said "people". We are all beautifully and perfectly imperfect.
23. Sometimes there is nothing you can do or say to foster forgiveness. Then again, maybe the friendship was a farce in the first place or not worth the effort you applied.
24. Life ebbs and flows. It's always changing and never constant. Appreciate every sunrise and what God has given you.
25. Having the change to reach people through books is an amazing and powerful thing!
26. Growing older doesn't hurt.
27. Growing wiser is a blessing.
28. We are the creators of our own destinies. Take hold of what you love and never let go, regardless of what anyone thinks.
29. Great courage and resilience can often be found in a person who actively chooses to remain silent.
30.  Puppies are incredible creatures. It is a joy and a privilege to have one.

One pooped puppy :)

Thanks for visiting. Have an incredible day!