Lessons Learned and Re-Learned

Over these last few weeks, I've found myself unexpectedly unemployed for the first time in many years and, although I've been interviewing and testing and all those good things, nothing has stuck as of yet. It is no surprise that no one is actively hiring during the last two weeks of the year. It is somewhat stressful, but I've got a wonderful, supportive husband and I'm just working to get something flexible enough to allow me to get back to school at night, with enough free time for writing and family. As we're near the start of a brand new year, it's a great time to reflect. In reflecting on what lead me to recently leave a shiny brand new job, I've learned and re-learned a few life lessons I'd like to share.

1. No one, no matter what title, status, or social standing they have deserves to be treated like garbage. Bullying is something that should never happen to our kids, to our co-workers, or to our friends. Until just recently, I never knew what being bullied actually felt like. I was ignorant. I figured it was something that could be shrugged off or ignored, but when it's tolerated and allowed in a school or work setting, no amount of shrugging it off will work. Bullies can be relentless, so if you see it happening, say something. Lauging along with a bully makes the person being bullied feel even more alienated. Bullies should not be tolerated. Find your voice and say something.

2. Find what you love and love what you do. I'm a strong believer that everything happens for a reason and that we're all on our own journey when it comes to finding and living out our passions. When working with others, find something good about your work, each day. Asking at the end of each work day these four questions will give you a guage to know if you're working effectively, to inact change, and to be an effective leader (even if you're not in a leadership capacity): Have I learned something? Have I taught something? Have I complimented someone? Have I fixed something? I believe if you truly care about what you do, you'll be able to answer each of these questions almost every day with a YES.

3. Stand up for something...Even if you feel like you're standing alone and naked in a blizzard. Don't sacrifice your morals or your values for anything, but also don't be afraid to let in new ideas and hear challenging viewpoints.

4. Embrace Change. It is inevitable, so embracing it becomes exciting, regardess of whether you're clutching it with your teeth gritted and your eyes closed. :)

5. Never, ever, ever underestimate the power of love and friendship. There is immeasurable power in loving others and being loved.

6. Death is a guarantee. We're all going to die someday, hopefully very far in the future. But, knowing we're going to die should mean we're living for something. If you're not sure what you're living for, reevaluate your priorities right now. Know makes you happy and if you're not doing it, decide why not and what you need to do to get to whatever happy looks like for you. Don't wait for tomorrow as it is not guaranteed.

7. Give to others. There is always a need. Do whatever you can do to help those in need or less fortunate. Make a tiny mark whenever possible. This will perpetuate one of the most powerful things in the world: hope.

8. Words are powerful. They can become weapons or inspire peace. Your words are meaningful and should be chosen very wisely. Think before you speak or before you hit that send button. Some things are better left unsaid, and some things need to be said before it's too late.

9. "Just because something shines doesn't mean that it's gold." Someone recenly said this to me when I was explaining what a great opportunity I had been given that I wasn't able take advantage of. I mulled this comment over for a few minutes and smiled, realizing this person was absolutely right.

10. Starting over takes courage and gumption. It's easy to become complacent and sit in an environent you hate because it's scary to step foot into the unknown. Sometimes you will stumble and fall and have regrets and anxiety. Sometimes nothing will come easy and everything will feel like pulling teeth. However, if nothing else, starting over will cause you to step out of your comfort zone and find a little more about yourself and your true character. And walking through that kind of experience, is invaluable.

I wish you a happy and peaceful 2016. May the best year yet be upon you!

Impact

In celebration of Independence day, I offered No Man Sam for free on Amazon Kindle and posted on a few sites stating that I would be donating .10 to Surviving in Numbers, an amazing organization that helps victims of rape and domestic violence.

I had 37 downloads the first day of the promotion. I prayed we would have success and posted to one more website and the downloads went wild! I am happy to say my husband and I had the privilege and opportunity to donate more than we could have ever imagined and it was the best thing ever. Not because people downloaded the book, but because their hearts were into helping others, just as ours were.

An incredible thing happened then. No Man Sam became one of the top free downloads in teenage romance (I believe it peaked at #2) and it broke the top 100 (and nearly the top 50) in free Kindle books. I'm not a known author, (and likely never be and that's cool with me), but the fact that others were downloading the book and the fact that it was becoming more visible meant more $$'s for Surviving in Numbers!

If you have a chance to check out the organization, I highly recommend it. If, by chance, you did download No Man Sam during the promotional free period, THANK YOU! It means everything that you were willing to try out a book by an unknown author and also help a cool organization in the process. It's a win-win-win all around!

I believe amazing things can happen when we step outside ourselves for a while and take a walk in someone else's shoes. Sometimes it takes walking in someone else's shoes to appreciate what we have or to realize what our purpose is and how we become changed. It's kind of like writing a fiction novel. When I get the chance to walk in a main character's shoes, it's fun, but kind of surreal at the same time because I don't like when bad things happen to them (even though I'm pulling all the strings). I'm sure that sounds weird.

The scary thing is, often, reality is worse than fiction. I helped unpack and tag new backpacks this morning in my community. 4500 kids in my area are going to have backpacks full of the pens, pencils, and notebooks they need to get a great start. 4500 kids. The reality is, 4500 kids isn't all the needy ones in my area. I wonder how the inner city kids and teachers get by. It makes me angry that every child doesn't have what they need for school. We often take what we have for granted.

If you are reading this and are able, I challenge you. Find an organization you want to be part of and volunteer or send a donation.

Remember, there can never be too many volunteers and every donation can make a difference, Heck, a dime per download eventually turned into enough money for Surviving in Numbers to be able to get into a few more schools. Every little bit counts. Some other great organizations to consider include Compassion International, Blood Water Mission, and The Wounded Warrior Project. If everyone gave a little bit more and consumed a little bit less...just IMAGINE how amazing our world could be! :)

Ok, I'll come off the soapbox on the next post...I promise. I just had to write what was on my heart.